Suffering

       I was angry with God.

  In addition to my chronic illness and extremely painful back injuries, I had a demanding job and a young daughter to care for. The son we'd hoped to adopt had left us and been placed in a mental hospital in spite of our efforts to help him. My husband had recently lost his job and bills were piling up. My mother was exhausted from nursing my terminally ill stepfather, but I was unable to assist her. I felt crushed.

  Reading my Bible didn’t seem to help. I saw no answer to my frequent prayers.

  When I talked to my pastor he said, “Sometimes you just have to forgive God.”

  I was shocked!

  Forgiving is what God does for us, I thought. Who am I to forgive him?

  Then I looked in the dictionary and discovered forgiveness simply means to give up anger against someone, and did not require any authority over them, so I forgave God and told him so. 

      When I forgave God and chose to love him no matter what my circumstances, He showed me that my suffering was not evil.

       No matter what happens I can refuse to harbor anger and resentment toward God, trust him, and choose to make pleasing him a priority in my life. Then even physical and emotional pain can show his glory.

  And I joyfully look forward to the eternal home where God has promised there will be no more tears, our bodies will not need the protection of pain, and we will live without separation from him forever. 

Problems, Problems, But...

     If you have read previous posts on this blog you know I've had a lot of special needs to deal with in my life. Asthma, chronic pain, food allergies, and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome are problems I've had myself. Through my foster kids, other family members, and the children I've worked with in various schools I've also dealt with learning disabilities, mental illness, personality disorders, learning disabilities, developmental delays, deafness, vision problems, autism, cancer, and many other conditions. 

     You'd think all those problems would have given me a negative view of life, but that's not the case at all. Instead, I have a positive attitude because of my faith in God.  I don't believe in cramming my beliefs down other people's throats, but I do want to share what has helped me in case that is helpful to others, so I'll be doing that in my posts for a while. I hope what I post here will make a positive difference for you.